From Grief to Acceptance; a Road Paved for Differently Abled Children

After becoming a mom to a Hard of hearing beautiful girl, I have started taking the time to learn about other kids born with different abilities. It has opened my mind and heart to always try and learn more about other people‘s journeys, struggles and wisdom to enrich my own. Learning more about different capabilities taught me different perspectives and provided me with stability throughout personal struggles.

I’ve seen that people go through hardships with their kids especially when they are different, and that having a daughter with hearing loss is not the end of the world. It doesn’t change the way she presents herself to the world. I had mixed feelings all the time about her health status but tried to stay optimistic, real and grounded. Sometimes I can barely deal with all the stress and the appointments and the things that are asked of me to give her an equal chance in life as any other child her age. I sometimes feel frustrated for having to work so hard for things we have always taken for granted. I sometimes mourn being a mom of a differently abled child or wish I can just be another mom with kids who have those usual milestones, and i feel guilty of my frustration because I am always grateful and lucky to be the mother of this incredibly resilient

little human, so I decided to do something about it. I will share how I feel with all honesty and try to help parents who have been in a similar position feel heard, seen, and genuinely supported. I have taught myself to be genuine and honest about my feelings and not fear facing them because eventually this builds a stronger stress tolerance and a better mental health, which we truly need as parents. As a result of my betterment, I am doing well every single day and I’m able to communicate more with her as I am able to understand myself and her situation even better.

Some of the hardest parts of adaptation is getting her to listen to me when her hearing aid ran out of battery or when she has a headache from wearing them all day, but I always aim to have a communication channel open with her no matter how hard it is, at the end of the day she is my daughter that needs just a few extra tweaks to make her life easier. I don’t want her to be treated differently just because she has special needs, and at the same time, I don’t want her to feel different and withdraw from people or lose her confidence. Having special needs does not mean having a problem, that’s what I try to teach my kid “you are different, but you are complete” she is able to thrive in this world just as any other person, regardless of the hearing aid. Her difference doesn’t make her special and it doesn’t make you out of the flock Being different equates having a unique pathway, carving your own path through life, reaching the same milestones as everyone else, but in a way that is uniquely your own, and even better even if you carve it differently.

It’s normal to be scared of something you are still learning how to maneuver and have to deal with its setbacks as you go along the way, but it’s not acceptable to give up. It’s not acceptable to be scared alone, find someone who will give you strength and will think of you as a miracle rather than a burden.

Most importantly, I realize everyday that in order to empower our children, we need to be strong , trusting, and emotionally balanced parents who instill all these traits into them. This is me giving my two cents to anyone today who are having a hard time with their child especially if they were chosen to go in their life with a unique pathway. You are not alone neither are your children. Build a community for them and a village for you to keep you safe and supported through the tough and happy times because many hands make work light!